My mom, probably the strongest influence on my life, went to be with the Lord April 15, 2013. It has been an unusual year for me. My family left home in 1979, so I’ve only gotten to see mom a couple of times a year since then. But we talked nearly every day since the advent of cell phones. In the early years after we moved she would make cassette tape recordings and mail to us weekly!
Living far away, many things haven’t changed for me. It is almost as if she is still at 215 waiting for the next visit. Regularly, reality hits me though when I want to tell her some news and go to call and remember she is gone. When I let my mind go there, it really is sad to think about her home sitting empty. She only lived in that place since my siblings and me were born. It was the hub of activity and she was the hub of the family.
Amazing what an impact parents can have on kids and later grand kids. My daughter told me yesterday how much she misses both my mom and dad, her grandparents. If you are a parent or grandparent, take the time to make an imprint.
I’m not sure what I feel. Sometimes I just feel kind of a dull ache. Sometimes everything in me screams to go to PA for a visit and sit on the back patio at 215. Someone wrote you can never go home again. In the physical sense that is true. Life and time march on and nothing remains the same. This moment will never be this moment again. The people and places that are today, may be totally different tomorrow and we cannot return to today.
For the Christian, this isn’t supposed to be home. We look for a city whose builder and maker is God. We look forward to a new place with loved ones reunited. Until then, we have to deal with change and loss and things never being the same the best way we can.
This July 4th my dad will be gone from us for 25 years. I still miss him very often. I wish I could talk to him, get a big bear hug from him, hang out together and see him with my kids and grandkids again. Teach us to number our days Lord and to live them wisely.