REALfitness by Scott

Here in Florida I’m a state certified energy rater. Recently, I’ve been studying for a national exam to move me to the next level. Something I recently learned is our homes are in a constant battle! Air pressure, temperature and water (humidity) are constantly attempting to balance inside the home with outside the home. Because it is more comfortable for us to have the inside different from the outside i.e. cooler in summer, less humidity and often less pressure through venting out steam etc., we must expend massive amounts of energy and go to heroic measures to fight against this process of balancing. So we insulate, provide vapor barriers, install heating and cooling systems so we can attempt to win the battle. All the energy we expend is attempting to make our domain more comfortable. Imagine now an island setting, laid back, no windows, big open air verandas, ceiling fans circulating the air, no battle between the inside and outside.

 

I’ve not thought this all the way through yet but I believe husbands and wives are alot like the inside and outside of the home. It is a constant battle for control. It shows up in many areas, finances, parenting, responsibilities, etc. We attempt to guard our turf, so we insulate and put up barriers of protection to keep our own comfort intact. It takes massive amounts of energy and protective layers to keep our interior environment from being encroached upon by our spouse. Here is a great litmus test for your relationship, "how much energy does it take to live with your partner? Or how much energy does it take your partner to live with you!" I want my marriage to be more like the tropical island home with open windows and no energy required to balance. Here is how that happens. Pick any topic and come to an agreement (surrender) how that issue will be handled by you as a couple. You don’t have to agree with how every minor detail is handled to be able to sign off on the plan. When you both agree fully, not one rolling over to keep the other happy, the energy that issue used to require is no longer necessary. There is balance which brings harmony. You’ve both given up the power by accepting a plan that you both can agree to. Both have compromised something but for the peace and harmony it will bring, you agree. The major conflict in relationships is one person attempting to dominate another rather than two adults living responsibily together. Relationships will come to a place of balance in power or they will break.

 

On another note, our peace with God comes when we throw open the windows and let His environment become our environment. The fight comes when I want my way instead of His way. When His way is my way, the energy can now be used to fight the enemy.

 

Just some Saturday morning thoughts!

 

Scott

  

 

A few months ago I became familiar with a place yet future called The Village of Hope in Uganda. Upon the first exposure to the place something deep inside me felt like I had to do something. A few months have passed and I’ve done some research, talked to people and feel more compelled than ever I need to do something. Our church has purchased 100 acres of land to build this village. We are currently raising funds for roads and wells. Later we will help build medical, educational, and housing facilities. I believe the Lord is going to use me to motivate a group of men to go over there and help build starting in the summer of 2009.

 

So, what is the Village of Hope? Why do we need this place of safe haven? Watch the video then go to this link http://www.villageofhopeuganda.com/ to learn more! Little children are abducted every night by LRA rebels. The children often only 6-8 years old are forced to murder their own parents and siblings. Sometimes to break them down they are forced to do unspeakable things to their own parents. One boy told the story of having to split his mother open and wear her intestines around his neck for two weeks! If these children escape from the rebels they are outcasts because they have killed. The Village of Hope is a place for these children to be loved back to life. It is a place for them to know there is a God in heaven who cares about them. It is a place that they can sleep at night and not worry about the rebels. It is a place where they can be educated and taken care of so they can have meaningful, productive lives one day. It is a place of Hope.

 

It is safe from rebels because it is 90 km south of where the rebels are and the Nile River is a natural barrier. There is only one bridge in the region and it is guarded by the Uganda military. So, the Village is a safe place. As Americans we have no idea what life is like in other places like this. We are so fortunate.

 

Scott

Well, last night was a first. Gayle and I and some people from our home study group volunteered to feed the homeless at a local place. There was plenty of help so I was given the role to "fellowship with the guests." In came the people to eat. Some looked different than I expected, some looked just like I expected. I’ve always had somewhat of an attitude towards the guys on the corner with the carcboard sign "Homeless, Hungry, God bless." I’ve actually told them to get a job on more than one occasion. So, now I’m enlisted to socialize with them. I find a guy that is sitting by himself, he actually had a name "Richard." We were sitting there talking, small talk when the pastor of the church that hosts the food kitchen came walking among the people eating and he didn’t know me. He put his hand on my shoulder and said "God bless you," thinking I was one of "them." My insides recoiled and I quickly introduced myself and told him what church I was from so he would know I was one of "us." It dawned on me how much like the Pharisees of Jesus day that makes me. As if somehow I am different than these people because maybe I’ve had a few more breaks in life. Then I started thinking about how many poor choices away from homeless I am and it isn’t really very many. How many paychecks missed would it take to be on the brink of financial ruin? All that I have is a gift from God. The parents and homelife I grew up with is a gift. The work ethic I have largely came from there. I can look over my history at some choices I made that nearly put me to the edge of being in major financial trouble but through grace I was spared. The mind, personality and educational opportunities afforded me are gifts as well. Gayle, who is a money managing machine is a gift and more responsible for my current well being than I am. My final realization is the Monday Night men’s group whom I love and meet with every week isn’t that much different than the men’s group I met with last night at the homeless kitchen. Each man has a story, has some hurts and financial problems, some relational problems and some are coping fairly well and others were not. I really needed this experience, it changed my attitude in many ways. Thank you Lord for allowing me to see that when you look at us humans you don’t see status, you see men and women for whom Christ died!

Well, my beautiful Gayle turned 55 August 15th. What an amazing lady she has become over the years. I was attracted to her in junior high school just because of her physical beauty, which I might add has only improved over the years (I think she still could wear her wedding gown!) But now after 30+ years of a growing relationship with Jesus Christ her internal beauty, strength, and grace only makes her outer beauty shine brighter. Gayle gave herself to me and raising our children as her major focus in life for the early years. We just had all three of our kids here with us a couple weeks ago, now they are 34; almost 32 and 25. It is amazing to see how much love and respect they all have for their mom and each other. We are so blessed to have adult chilcren who love us and love each other and that is a tribute to the investment Gayle made in them. She has made choices, hard choices along the way to make our marriage be so good as we approach our 36th anniversary this year. We love each other severely and enjoy each moment we have together, whether at home or on an adventure. Gayle has come into her own as a humble, strong and very much respected lady. She is regularly asked to lead things, share her life lessons, or write an article,  though she really always shuns the spotlight. She is such a strong "behind the scenes" person, she will really not like this tribute! Gayle, you are such a gift to me, to our kids and to all who know you! I’m so blessed you chose me to be your journey mate through life! I hope we both continue to bloom for the next 30 or so years!! I love you misiz!!!!!

This morning 8/9/08, I was arrested for possessing stolen property! Because of the value and issues involved it was a federal felony crime! I was out for one of my last long runs training for an upcoming race. I had just spent two days at Willow Creek’s Leadership Summit, Thursday and Friday. I think it was sleeping on the powerful things I heard that prompted my arrest. I was running and really sensed the Lord calling me to a deeper surrender of my life. I actually sensed Him saying you are in possession of stolen property, you actually belong fully to Me (You have been bought with a price) but you have taken possession of something that no longer belongs to you. I’m not going to give you all the gory details of the exchange but I believe I came to the fullest surrender of my Christian life. First, He started with who He is. Do you believe I’m Good? Do you believe I’m fair? Do you believe I’m safe and can be trusted? Why do you hold back so much of yourself then? Why do you draw so many lines you are not willing to cross for Me? By now I’m ready and willing to begin the process of looking deeply into myself and I start surrendering areas I have been squeezing tightly.

 

Lord, I surrender my rights: To Live near the coast. To ever even see an ocean again. To have creature comforts. To pursue the "American Dream." To ever retire. To live where I can see family even children. To ever expect anyone to forgive me for a wrong I’ve committed. Lord, I die to myself so the life I now live will be Christ in me. There was way more, some very personal, the bottom line is each moment of each day at every fork in the road when I have a choice between my desire and His will, His will wins. What He chooses to do with me if anything is totally His business. I’m called to love Him, even if I never sense His presence again in my earthly life. As Job said, though He slay me yet will I trust Him. He is Good, He is fair, and He is safe and I belong fully to Him!

 

Scott

 

When I was 21 years old, a few years back now, I came to know the Lord Jesus as my Savior. I didn’t know much about the Bible or the Christian life but it wasn’t long till I found myself engaging people in one on one conversations about the Lord and what it meant to know Him. People seemed to open up to me. I even had my pastor tell me some very personal things and then say, "I am not sure why I told you that." Now I know, God gifted me with a likeable personality, an ability to make the complex simple and what I’ll call the trust factor. People just felt like they could trust me. I’m not sure over the years how many scores of people I helped come into a relationship with the Lord but it was the "excitement" factor in my life. I lived in an anticipation wondering, "who’s life will change today?" I knew God was using me and I was available anytime and anywhere. One of my neatest stories was of helping a young man find his way to Christ while I was on vacation. We were on a fishing pier about 1am in the morning! He went on to become a Christian leader in his church.

 

Then my role became more complex being a pastor and serving in churches for 18 years. The truth is the work of the church pretty much killed the work of God in my life. I had grown weary with people in my role as a leader of the ministry and all the political wranglings and power struggles that go on in churches. I actually pretty much stopped engaging people one on one unless it happened as a result of my professional role.  

 

Fast forward now, its been 4 years since I’ve been a full time minister. Last week in a strong encounter with the Lord through my time of reading, thinking and praying, He showed me I was made for those one on one encounters. That is my life’s purpose. That is where I’m most useful to Him. That is where all He has built into me comes together into the most effective use of my life. Seeing that purpose come clear and having everything in me resonate with it has relit the passion in my life.  My radar is back on, I’m listening for the soft promptings of the Lord to say, "son, I need you to share me with. . ." I’m living the adventure again wondering, "who’s life will change today?"

 

Scott

After reading "The Shack," I began to realize I had a pocket of hurt inside me that has never been dealt with appropriately. I learned that hurt when not forgiven can grow into bitterness. Bitterness will show up as an anger that lies just beneath the surface waiting for opportunity to show itself. So, I found myself sometimes in that state of mind that any slight, any driver being inconsiderate had me feeling like I wanted to flip them the bird, in a Christian sort of way of course! I hadn’t connected that anger to some unresolved hurt before. I shared this with my men’s group and each man said that anger was right there under the surface as well. I’m coming to see that as humans we are more wounded than wicked. We act in ways that appear wicked at times but it comes out of a core of hurt that led to bitterness that leads to angry outbursts and sometimes wicked behaviors. If my theory is right and I believe it is, nothing will remove the angry outburts until the hurt is revisitied and resolved. The only remedy I know to resolving those deep hurts is to forgive who hurt you, releasing them to a higher authority. When the wound heals, the angry outburts will disappear too.

 

Scott

Gayle was recently given a copy of "The Shack." It is a fiction writing by William P. Young and you can learn about it at www.theshackbook.com. The book is fiction, it says so right on the cover. I’ve been around the church long enough to know it is going to cause a ruckus! But for me, I saw nothing that in any way was theologically incorrect. To the contrary, I was brought to places where I was confessing to the Father hurting people, being unloving to people and I also forgave many people for what they did to me. I also sensed the love of God and wanted to live in that love and pass it on to others as well. The Shack, is a book that will bless your socks off or make you madder than a hornet I guess based on your view of the Almighty! The view of the Lord presented here is the way I have seen God treat me and those around me. The view of God presented in the Shack is Lord as I’ve come to know Him. I hope you get a chance to read a copy sometime real soon. I may read it again very soon!

 

Scott

Our middle daughter, Lisa is a huge NASCAR fan and her favorite driver is Dale Earnhardt, Jr. A year ago she and I went to Daytona for the "Firecracker 400" as it used to be known. Before we went to the race last year I was working with a friend one day whose name is Matt H. I was telling Matt how excited Lisa was to go to the race. He began to tell me about growing up in Daytona and going to many events over the years. He said he had some stuff that would make our day more fun. He lent us a scanner and earphones and Lisa was able to listen to the conversation between crew chiefs and drivers. It was an awesome day, especially for her. Matt told me another story that day together about how his dad had given him a gift to do a Richard Petty Drive Along Experience. His dad passed away before Matt could use the gift and he said he really didn’t want to go anymore. The date on the gift voucher was December 13, 2000. Matt said he wanted to give that gift to my daughter, that was early summer 2007. Matt had verified they would still accept the coupon. As we were getting ready to go, now June 2008, I began to read the fine print on the voucher and it said it was good for one year from the date on the front! I thought with the price of gas, they may not still honor that. I called and emailed and was told to come on over. I printed out the emails as a back up and sure enough, they honored the voucher. Lisa was about to burst when she saw they had a car there that was "Dale, Jr’s." I told the guy she’d be willing to wait longer to ride in that and sure enough she got it. Three quick laps getting up to 165-170 MPH later and she was one excited young lady. Check out the pictures here on the site. So Matt, I really wish your dad were here and you and he got to enjoy the moment together! I also am really grateful you gave my daughter such a generous, very special gift! I’m sure she’ll treasure the experience as long as she has memory! Thanks Matt!!

 

Scott